Chronic Stress: Causes and Effects on Well-being

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Stress: What It Is, Where It Comes From, and Why It Matters

In the previous post, we explored how different personality types respond to stress—and how, often unintentionally, they trigger stress in others. This post takes the next step by examining:

  • What stress actually is

  • Common sources of stress

  • How chronic stress impacts health, performance, and relationships


What Stress Really Is

Americans represent roughly 5% of the world’s population, yet consume a disproportionate share of the world’s psychotropic medications, tranquilizers, and mood enhancers. While these substances may reduce symptoms, they do not resolve stress—and many carry significant side effects and addictive potential. This points to a deeper cultural issue: we are living under sustained psychological pressure.

At its core, stress is a biological survival mechanism.

When we encounter a threat, the body releases hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol, increasing heart rate, blood pressure, and available energy. Nonessential systems—digestion, growth, immune repair, and reproduction—are temporarily suppressed. In the short term, this response sharpens focus and enhances certain aspects of learning and memory. It is highly adaptive when the threat is immediate and short-lived—a snarling dog or a car swerving into our lane.


The Modern Stress Dilemma

The problem arises when non-life-threatening stressors—financial worry, job insecurity, difficult bosses, interpersonal conflict, or the chronic need to please—activate the same physiological response. Over time, this constant activation becomes destructive.

Our brains cannot reliably distinguish between real physical danger and imagined or anticipated threat. Merely perceiving danger activates the fight-or-flight response. In this sense, fear often operates as FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real.

Leading neuroscientist Robert Sapolsky has shown that chronic activation of the stress response for psychological reasons significantly increases the risk of:

  • Hypertension and cardiovascular disease

  • Adult-onset diabetes

  • Gastrointestinal disorders

  • Immune suppression

  • Cognitive decline and impaired memory

Neurons in brain regions associated with learning, judgment, and emotional regulation do not function optimally under chronic stress—and prolonged exposure has been shown to contribute to neuronal damage.


Anger, Hostility, and Health

Negative emotional states—particularly chronic anger and hostility—exert a powerful toll on the body. In Anger Kills, experimental psychologist Redford Williams demonstrated that hostile, driven individuals (the classic Type A behavioral profile) are significantly more likely to suffer heart attacks—often fatal ones.

Importantly, these individuals also tend to generate stress in others, a dynamic we explored in the prior personality-type post. Research further shows that toxic leadership environments—characterized by dominance, hostility, emotional blindness, and relentless pressure—are associated with increased rates of stress-related illness and cardiac events in the workplace.


The Bottom Line

When stress becomes chronic—as it has for many in today’s uncertain economic and social climate—it shifts from a survival aid to a serious health risk. Heart disease, immune dysfunction, metabolic disorders, and cognitive decline are not merely lifestyle issues; they are often downstream effects of prolonged psychological stress.

This is not a personal failure. It is a biological mismatch between ancient stress systems and modern life.

The good news is that stress is learnable and manageable.

In the next post, I’ll outline practical strategies for regulating stress, cultivating calm, and responding consciously rather than reacting automatically—especially in relationships and high-demand work environments.

For now, pause and take three slow, deep breaths. Deep breathing helps oxygenate the brain, metabolize stress hormones, and shift the nervous system out of fight-or-flight—creating space for choice rather than compulsion.

As writer Anaïs Nin observed:

“We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are.”


Alignment With the Personality-Type Stress Framework

This stress model directly supports the earlier personality-type framework:

  • Driver / Results-Oriented types tend to externalize stress through urgency, dominance, and pressure—often triggering fear and withdrawal in others.

  • Analytical / Task-Oriented types may internalize stress, leading to rumination, anxiety, and cognitive overload.

  • Relationship-Oriented types often absorb relational stress, resulting in burnout or self-neglect.

  • Expressive / Creative types may oscillate between emotional reactivity and avoidance when overstimulated.

Most interpersonal conflict arises not from malice, but from unrecognized stress patterns interacting across different personality orientations. Understanding both stress physiology and typology allows for greater empathy, self-regulation, and more effective collaboration.


Resources & References (Professionally Tightened)

  • Robert Sapolsky — Stress: Portrait of a Killer, National Geographic Documentary

  • Anger Kills — Redford Williams, PhD & Virginia Williams, PhD

  • Brain Longevity — Dharma Singh Khalsa, MD

  • Richard Wolff — “Capitalism and Its Discontents,” Sun Magazine


Author’s Note

This article integrates findings from neuroscience, experimental psychology, and health psychology, my 25 years as a leadership coach and educator with personality-type theory developed across classical and modern traditions. Sources are selected for empirical rigor and relevance to applied leadership, coaching, and relational contexts.

The Power of Awareness for Personal Growth

We are bombarded daily with messages—from advertisers, social media, movies, news outlets, workplaces, families, schools, religious institutions, and politicians to name only a few. Much of this messaging happens beneath our conscious awareness. Neuroscience has even found that the brain can be more active during sleep than while passively watching television—unless we are highly selective about what we consume.

Without realizing it, we internalize countless messages thrust upon us every day. Advertisers and social media platforms use sophisticated algorithms, along with classical and operant conditioning techniques, to shape our beliefs and condition our desires—often convincing us to want things we don’t need. As a society, we have been trained to equate success with money, status, and possessions. We are shown endless images of what the “ideal” woman or man should look like, what success supposedly entails, what we should drive, and even how we should think.

Compounding this, we naturally seek out information that confirms what we already believe. Our choice of news sources, political affiliations, religious orientations, and self-concepts all reinforce a familiar worldview. This tendency has a name.

In his book What Makes Your Brain Happy and Why You Should Do the Opposite, David DiSalvo writes:

“The brain doesn’t merely prefer certainty over ambiguity—it craves it.”

Our need to be right is actually a need to feel right. Neurologist Robert Burton refers to this as certainty bias—a bias that quietly distorts our thinking. Because our brains crave certainty, we often feel anxious or threatened when our worldview—religious, political, or cultural—is challenged, even when compelling evidence contradicts our beliefs.

Seen through this lens, it becomes easier to understand why differing viewpoints, cultures, religions, and ways of life can feel threatening. If my way of thinking is right, good, and true, then your way must be wrong. And if I am good, then you must be bad—or even evil. And evil must be fought.
Right?
Or… is there another way?

This dynamic helps explain why religion—intended as a force for meaning and healing—can become a source of division and conflict. The problem is not any particular religion. The problem is our unexamined minds.

Philosopher and integral theorist Ken Wilber describes moral development as unfolding in three broad stages:

  • Egocentric: It’s all about me

  • Ethnocentric: It’s all about us

  • Worldcentric: It’s about all of us

This parallels Lawrence Kohlberg’s stages of moral development: pre-conventional, conventional, and post-conventional. Wilber suggests that roughly 70% of the world’s population remains at the ethnocentric level, meaning we interpret reality primarily through the lens of our tribe—our culture, religion, nationality, or political ideology.

When ethnocentric worldviews dominate—combined with weapons of mass destruction, vast economic inequality, resource depletion, and environmental degradation—it doesn’t take an Einstein to see where we may be headed.

If humanity is to move toward peace, sustainability, and a shared sense of global responsibility, a critical mass of people must grow into the third stage of moral development: worldcentric consciousness.

Carl Jung was once asked whether there was hope for the world. His response was simple and sobering:

“There is—if enough people do their inner work.”

Each of us is called to wake up from the collective trance and recognize that there is only one human family. As Desmond Tutu reminded us, “We are all family.” Jung and other depth psychologists understood that, at a soul level, we are profoundly interconnected. This insight echoes Jesus’ teaching: “Whatever you do to the least of these, you do unto me.” Einstein, too, observed that our sense of separateness is ultimately an illusion. Even physics now points toward the same conclusion: at an energetic level, we are deeply connected.

Jung believed that neurosis arises from being—or having to be—someone we are not. It is the imprisonment of living according to external definitions of who we should be. Shakespeare captured this brilliantly: “The most confining prisons are the ones we do not know we are in.” Psychological health, then, is not perfection—it is authenticity. As Einstein put it, it is learning “to see with your own eyes and feel with your own heart.”

To wake up and develop awareness is to step outside our emotional conditioning. Daniel Starr describes this as stepping outside the emotional field. Awareness allows us to override unconscious conditioning. It is the foundation of growth, healing, and personal responsibility. With awareness, we gain choice. Without it, we live on autopilot—repeating patterns that are not truly ours. The names, places, and people may change, but the outcomes remain eerily familiar.

As awareness grows, so does choice. And with choice comes the possibility of living more intentionally and creatively.

So how do we wake up from a conditioned, neurotic life?

According to Starr and many wisdom traditions, the first step is learning to become an observer—a witness to our moment-to-moment experience. When we can observe a thought or emotion without identifying with it, we are far less likely to be driven by it. This is a crucial step toward self-mastery.

Equally important is learning to observe without judgment. Self-criticism traps us in emotional reactivity. Awareness, on the other hand, reveals our repetitive patterns and gives us the freedom to choose differently. Self-mastery enhances our effectiveness—not only in our work and vocation, but in our relationships and inner life.

Emotions are states of mind, and we are always experiencing one—whether we realize it or not. Thoughts and emotions are tightly linked. A thought triggers an emotion, which sparks another thought, carrying more emotional “baggage.” Left unchecked, this feedback loop intensifies. Many of us recognize this pattern when we repeatedly replay an upsetting situation and grow increasingly agitated. This process is often called awfulizing or catastrophizing.

The good news? Once we are aware of it, this pattern becomes surprisingly manageable.

Awareness is the cornerstone of self-mastery. So when you first notice yourself awfulizing, reward yourself—not sarcastically, but genuinely. You are associating a positive emotion with awareness, rather than adding another layer of self-criticism.

Negative emotions usually signal a mismatch between what we are experiencing and what we want. Instead of resisting this, we can use it as information. The steps are simple:

  1. Reward yourself for noticing the negative emotional state.

  2. Identify what you don’t want, and ask: If this isn’t what I want, then what do I want?

  3. Imagine and feel what it would be like to have what you do want.

The third step is essential. You are now consciously choosing an emotional state—shifting from conditioned reaction to intentional response. This shift strengthens self-mastery and improves our capacity to handle stress and frustration.

Wherever we place our attention, energy flows. William James, often called the father of psychology, observed that we become what we habitually think about. Neuroscience now confirms this: repeatedly focusing on virtues and strengths actually rewires neural pathways, helping us embody the qualities we value.

Happiness, in the deepest sense, is not something we chase—it is a byproduct of purpose, meaning, healthy relationships, and the feeling that our lives matter. Psychological maturity comes from knowing who we are, taking responsibility for our behavior, accepting our strengths and limitations, and learning to love ourselves—so that we can genuinely love others. As Marianne Williamson reminds us, true affluence is knowing what matters and aligning our lives accordingly.

Each of us is summoned to live our own life—and to wake up from the trance.

The world needs you.


Suggested Reading

  • What Makes Your Brain Happy and Why You Should Do the Opposite — David DiSalvo

  • The Essential Ken Wilber: An Introductory Reader

  • The Middle Passage: From Misery to Meaning in Midlife — James Hollis

Overcoming Addictions and Compulsions: “Finding Your Self” by Peter Metzner

If something out side of your self is the reason you are happy;  you are hostage to it.  Ekhard  Tolle

In over 15 years in being in the field of Human Development, I have seen no correlation with having a lot of material things and “happiness”.   Money is important and ranks along  with oxygen to live.   Yet, when there is enough oxygen to breathe  it doesn’t register in our awareness of needs.

Neuroscience has found that money or accumulating money stimulates the pleasure centers of our brains.      If we are happy, have supportive relationships and are living meaningfully and with purpose,  material comforts can  enhance our sense of well-being.   However,  if we are unhappy,  we are  like hungry ghosts.   Searching and driven yet never satisfied.  Riches, material comfort, distractions etc.  can’t make us happy if we are anxious, driven, unhappy or suffering from low self-esteem or lack of meaning.   If materialistic ambition becomes a substitute for our intrinsic needs for giving and receiving love and doing work that is “right” for us, we can become addicted in the pursuit of diversions, pleasure, accumulating “things” , titles, accomplishments, etc.

Neuroscientist Robert Sapolsky, PhD  explains, “dopamine levels increase as soon as we start anticipating a reward. Once the dopamine starts flowing, monkeys and people will work and work and work expecting  a treat.  For monkeys,  a grape is usually enough.   For people, the treats include:  a pair of sneakers, a shiny car, an MBA that might lead to a high-paying job, early retirement, a couple of minutes of entertaining diversion, a few seconds of sexual gratification, etc…    Monkeys and people’s neurochemistry  function virtually the same!    The main difference: “Monkeys don’t get hooked on beliefs, ideologies, dogma, degrees, titles, fantasies, lies, empty promises, or self-deceptions” .

What is known about addictions:

  • Any behavior that can deliver a dopamine reward can become an addiction.
  • The more powerful the addiction, the greater the denial, the weaker the free will, the more likely addicts are to detest any information that threatens to keep them from feeding their addictions.
  • It’s possible to get addicted to safety, peer approval, and esteem.   (The dopamine project)

Using brain scanning equipment, researchers have found that there is basically one addiction—dopamine addiction. When heroin addicts shoot up, the street drug tells their brains to produce dopamine. Heroin is a trigger.  Dopamine flow creates the sensation of being ‘high.’ When it comes to scoring dopamine rewards, there are many triggers. For some the trigger is cocaine. For others it’s nicotine, alcohol, sex, gambling, or food.  Street drugs are physical dopamine triggers that are hard to deny because they need the ingesting, inhaling, or injecting of addictive substances.  Sadly, physical dopamine addictions destroy lives and wreak societal damage.  Researchers have recently added video games and texting to the list. Yet the most dangerous dopamine triggers include easy to deny psychological addictions. Psychological dopamine addictions may be more insidious because addictive emotions, memories, thoughts, fantasies, ideologies, rhetoric, and deceptions also trigger release of  dopamine.

An addiction is anything you can’t stop doing and it serves as an anxiety management system.  Along with addictions come formidable psychological defenses.  They include self-deception, denial, and a lack of morality that can even lead to a capacity for murder.   Reason, integrity, morality and a distaste for lying, cheating, stealing, and killing  that non-addicts value are often no match to addicts of:   power, money, fame, substances etc.   We see  in history and current events “examples of unstoppable, unreasonable, inhumane, addict/killers attacking, vilifying, and eliminating reasoning, humane, non-addict/non-killers” (The Dopamine Project)

Addicts have an amazing capacity to dismiss and deny facts, truth, and reason.   “Dopamine flow fuels addictions: More dopamine = yes, like, do more while dopamine withdrawal = stop, hate, avoid. “Thinking”   justifies, rationalizes, and defends  dopamine-influenced decisions”. (The Dopamine Project)  In other words,  intelligence  in the service of  addiction.

One of the most addictive abstractions is money.  Someone  addicted to alcohol or drugs, increasingly organizes their life  around the use and abuse of their substance(s) of choice.  The person who uses money to mood alter can have their relationship with money spin out of control; by being overly focused on accumulating it, spending it, hoarding it or using it to control people, places and things. For example,  as with a drug or alcohol, tolerance increases and a person  may find him/ herself needing to devote increasingly larger amounts of time to these activities, to get the same mood altering high that only a little once provided.  They become increasingly preoccupied with all things related to getting and maintaining their “substance”  excluding  other areas of living.  Gradually, just like any addict, money and the relationship with money becomes a primary preoccupation.   (Tian Dayton, PhD)    Personal drives and identity become so wrapped up around money  that they lose sight of who “they really are” .

No matter how much they have, money addicts crave more.    As with all addictions, the first pleasure is soon replaced by cravings and withdrawal.  Acquiring more money only increases stress levels which keep money addicts craving more money while worrying about losing what they already have.  Money is highly addictive because it quickly and easily converts into other dopamine triggers that feed other addictions like drugs, foods, sex, gambling, approval, status, and power.  The corrupting influences of money addiction everywhere and at every level of society.

So what does this have to do with Finding your “Self”. 

“Since our capacity for Self deception is truly monumental”  (Yorum Kaufam ) Self Awareness and  Self Mastery entails being aware:  of who we really are, what truly matters, the emotions that drive our behaviors, being able to “regulate or manage them,  knowing our passions, our talents, owning our weaknesses and:   what our “Self”,  Psyche or Soul are asking of us.  This is an awareness of what we truly value and a growing understanding  of our place in the world and connection to the transcendent.  To get there,  we need to recognize the mine fields, the seductions and powerful conditioning  of society that  pulls us to these  baser levels of living, wanting  and consuming.  Freud wrote that “The price of civilization is neurosis” – neuroses defined as  ” being someone who you are not”.

Rather than conform mindlessly or automatically to the expectations of  society,  we can  listen to that small voice. If we are quiet and still enough, summoning the will to live a life that is authentically ours.   “When we allow our light to shine we give permission for others lights to shine” ( Marian Williamson)    The great change agents throughout history, Christ, Buddha, Mohammed, Gandhi, Mandela, Martin Luther King, etc.  all answered their summons to raise human consciousness, be in relationship to the transcendent,  live mindfully, ethically and see all of humanity as family.

It is OK  to not fully know our  selves or our true North.   The beginning of wisdom is to realize what you don’t know.  To get there requires openness, receptivity and  mindfulness.    I was forty before shifting into my role of teaching, coaching & training.   By  seeking to stay true to yourself, your values and what energizes you is the compass that helps in finding your way.

The Greek god Aesculapius decreed “that it  is through suffering we come to wisdom” .   Avoidance of suffering can lead to and fuel addictions, compulsions and flights from reality.  (James Hollis) Suffering can also give us empathy, understanding and insights which can help others work through their pain.  Being fully human is to experience the full range of emotions.  Being aware and   experiencing   “all”  emotions enables us to live more fully,  better exercise  free will,  intentionality and grow into the person we are meant  to be.

 “There is hope for the world if enough people do their inner work“. C. G. Jung

References and suggested readings:

The Dopamine Project – Better Living Through Dopamine Awareness : see  http://dopamineproject.org/

Swamplands Of  The Soul – New Life in Dismal Places, James Hollis inner City Books  1996

What Makes Your Brain Happy and Why You Should do the Opposite.  David Disalvo Prometheus Books  2011.

River of Time Guided Visualization and Relaxation Process by Peter Metzner

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  • Eliminate stress?
  • Sustain self-confidence in the most challenging situations?
  • Maintain a healthy perspective towards life challenges?
  • Letting go of self-limiting beliefs?
  • Discovering your true life’s goals?
  • Staying  calm?
  • Generating a good nights sleep 365 days a year?
  • Enjoying a greater engagement with life?
  • Maximizing your energy all day long?
  • Dealing with the complexities of life?

For the price of a decent bottle of wine you can change your mood and life forever. 

I  made a CD and audio of a guided visualization and relaxation process I have been doing with various groups for over twelve years.  After going through the process,  many report:  increased self-confidence, sense of well-being, a healthier perspective, ability to  connect to meaningful goals, greater calmness and focus as well as sleeping better and having more energy!

The River of Time Audio enables you to experience  deep relaxation, allows you to release stress and let go of self-limiting beliefs.

It is crucial for health and mental well being to activate the the relaxation response daily.   A relaxed body relaxes the mind, giving a much greater capacity to manage life’s challenges.   It is clinically impossible to be anxious or stressed while the body is relaxed!

There are numerous ways to activate the relaxation response.    Gardening, golf, walking,  meditation and yoga to name a few.  An advantage of the guided visualization and relaxation  process is that not only does it assist  in achieving a deep state of relaxation – it  helps in letting go of self limiting beliefs and can you connect to the  true  North of your  inner compass.

After facilitating dozens of this process live to students, teachers, and people from all walks of life, many have connected to deeper and more meaningful goals;  and experienced the calmness, focus and drive to take action in going after them!

I hope you will experience this proven process.  Below is a  testimonial:

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River of Time CD

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How to Manage Stress: Daily Habits for a Healthier Life

Finding Balance: Practical Ways to Reduce Stress and Restore Well‑Being

With chronic stress taking such a toll on our health, productivity, and overall sense of well‑being, it’s essential to develop habits and strategies that help bring balance back into our lives. Everyone is different, and each of us may find unique approaches that work best. Below are practical, immediately useful insights that can help you cultivate greater joy, meaning, and resilience. The good news is that none of them are expensive.

Make Time Each Day for Something Relaxing

We all need at least one activity each day that is calming and done purely for enjoyment. For me, meditation is the ideal way to start the morning. I visualize what I want to accomplish, how I want to feel, and the impact I hope to have through my classes, seminars, and coaching. Setting an intention truly works.

Move Your Body

Exercise is one of the most effective stress busters available. Even a brisk 30–40 minute walk helps flush out stress hormones and provides a fresh perspective. Research consistently shows strong links between poor diet and chronic disease. Processed foods and sugary snacks contribute to obesity, high blood pressure, mood swings, low energy, and inflammatory conditions. A diet rich in whole, unprocessed foods—especially fruits and vegetables—gives the body the fuel it needs to repair and restore itself. Think of it this way: if you wouldn’t put low‑grade fuel in your car, why put it in your body? Avoid the “hit‑and‑run” junk food trap.

Shift Your Mindset

An optimistic attitude enhances coping skills and helps us manage stress more productively. When we accept our current situation without harsh self‑judgment and view challenges as opportunities for growth, a profound shift occurs. Problems become “needed developmental opportunities for us to grow and become more capable and mature.” Choosing the belief, I can do this helps rewire the brain, triggers more positive emotions, and supports the actions needed to move forward.

Manage Negative Thoughts

Learning to quiet negative, self‑critical, or anxious thoughts is a powerful form of personal mastery. This requires creating an inner space where you can reset. Daily meditation is a highly effective way to detox both mentally and physically. Ironically, the “discipline” lies in doing nothing—simply learning to still the mind and rest in inner quiet. As Wayne Dyer said, “You will find your Self in the space between two thoughts.”

The Science Behind It

Dr. Andrew Newberg, a radiologist at Penn and a leading authority on neuro‑theology, found that even novice meditators improved their memory by meditating just twelve minutes a day for a few weeks. Simply reflecting on the values most important to you—compassion, peace, love, empowerment—strengthens the neural pathways that help you live those values more fully.

References & Additional Reading

Pamela Holzman: http://www.pamelaholtzman.com/its-not-obsession-its-discipline/

Steve Volk, “Fringe-ology: How I Tried to Explain Away the Unexplainable—And Couldn’t,” HarperCollins, 2011

The National Wellness Institute: http://www.nationalwellness.org/